And life goes on...

I walked in the door and there, right at the moment I crossed over the threshold, the flashback hit me. So quick! My eyes spotted the kitchen island holding the teapot. That teapot has been around my whole life. All 52 years and who knows how many before. I can't tell you if it's black or really dark brown, but it has red flowers of a sort on it. It's distinct, so it's not like I'm mistaken. Nope this is the teapot that was always used to make the tea.. unsweetened tea that we repeatedly and totally unsuccessfully, tried to sweeten in our glasses. And since sugar won't dissolve in cold water, we always had a big thick stack of sugar sitting in the bottom of the Fostoria glasses.

The Fostoria.. When you go get a glass, that's just what you get. And yes, they're still there. Some in the china cabinet that has been in that exact location as long as I remember, and some in the kitchen cabinet, next to the brown bowls, next to the gray coffee cups, near the gold trimmed, floral-painted, just the right size for ice cream dessert bowls. Where they've been my WHOLE life... and this is the 2nd set of built-in cabinets, but the dish storage remained the same. I remember (barely) when the first new sink and the built-in cabinets came... I was born in 1961. A few years have passed.

I'm at my grandmother's house. Let me work through the math... My grandmother died in 1995 (maybe 96) and was 79 years old. She would be about 96 now. The house was built when she was 10, if memory serves me right. That would put it about 1927. My great grandfather worked the railroad and always had work during the depression. My "Granny" (great-grandmother) fed hungry folks on the front porch. She always had some "extra".

My father was raised in that house. His parents divorced when he was young and his mother moved the 2 of them in with her mother. Somewhere along the way, my great grandfather died and Grandmothers siblings grew up and moved on, as did my dad, leaving my Granny and Grandmother living together. My grandmother was working woman and kept that house in tip-top operating shape. When she died, her younger sister moved in, bringing many of her own things, but thankfully, keeping many of the old treasures.

When I married, my grandmother gave me 6 sets of her china with the promise of me receiving the rest upon her death. The china had been purchased bit by bit from Woolworth's. Grandmother's promise was kept and when I was home for her funeral, Aunt Betty gave me the rest of the china. She didn't like seeing it leave the house, but she sent me home with it anyway, honoring my grandmother's wish.

I'm back in town now because Aunt Betty is dying. It hasn't been a long process. Thanksgiving she was "fine" - having some back pain, but "fine". She didn't really know (or want to know) until very recently that she was full of untreatable cancer. It's all been very fast. So I'm home. I want to say "Goodbye" to her face. It's a joy, a privilege. I'm going to miss her, but it is an honor to get to help see her off. I've massaged her arms, wet her lips, offered water (such tiny sips), sung to her, looked deep in her eyes and told her I love her and thanked her for loving me. What more can you do?

I've roamed through the house today, and, with my daddy, laughed and laughed as we found beautiful reminders of who Grandmother was. She's the one who ran that house for so long and her fingerprints are all over it. The boxes, paper boxes from the office, neatly packed with items - this and that, then tied with string, each carefully labeled and the contents actually match the label... after all this time! She wasn't a hoarder by any stretch. Her house was uncluttered. But she saved things. Funny things. She didn't waste anything. One box was tied with several pieces of ribbon patched together with knots to make it long enough. Another contained perfectly shaped, non-smashed bows from packages (how I remember her neatly cutting them off the wrapping w/ little scissors!), ornaments (and Christmas lights! so vintage they're actually vintage!), her nativity set that my brother always played with, a picture (just one) of my Granddaddy (her ex husband), my wedding invitation - in perfect condition, with the invite to the rehearsal dinner and the placard and my thank you note. I even heard that they found (this week) a pair of her stockings in a neat piece of plastic labeled "Do not wear. Hole in toe." Now, why oh why did this neatie keep that? To tie up the roses? She died 17 years ago. My. My.

The Pollyanna Game we played. Have you played Pollyanna? This one has wooden pieces. The Old Maid set labeled "full deck". The carefully wrapped saw (to protect you from the blade, you know). Her bed in its always place. There is more stuff in the house now, since Betty moved in 17 years ago, but the old stuff is still there and in pristine condition. Most of it doesn't matter to anyone, I guess. I want my brother to have that nativity. I hope for the table linens for my son's wedding., but I've been given the china already, so I don't want to be greedy. I'm thrilled my daddy was there to identify his old art box - no, no paint in it, but rather paintings he did when he was a boy! Oh boy! The real treasure is all of the memories. Sliding down the stairs. Pasting Wildlife Federation Stamps into a spiral book (Grandmother's idea of fun for kids). The comfort of knowing where to look for a glass and what it will look like and feel like. The scrambled eggs, served in a small bowl that never, ever stuck to the iron skillet.

She is gone, but her life has continued with us in our wonderful memories. Betty will go, too. But these beloved people will not be forgotten. I've shared them with you and you will help me remember.

I'm not ANYBODY

Oh, Lord, give me the words. Help me express the things you're teaching me. May the words flow in a way that is clear.

I know or have spoken to some famous and/or powerful people. There. I said it. Brushes with greatness  as they say. I've had them. I like them and yes, I'm fairly enamored by them. Please don't judge me for being honest about it.

I'm questioning it, though. Judging myself. Trying to understand why I'm impressed by the perception of power. I know none of those folks are going to tap my shoulder and say, "Come. Let me make you famous and help you get lots of money." Truth be told, I don't want that really. (well, not always) Increasingly, I think what I want is a platform. I have to check my motives here and be sure that I'm being honest about that. I remember craving some type of fame, some type of notoriety... for what I don't know, I have nothing particular to offer - no remarkable talent, skill or wisdom ... I used to want people to be impressed by my singing and want me to make albums. I remember that. In my youth. But now... no. I'd do it, but I don't crave it or dream about it. Still... I am impressed by celebrity... kind of... I think...

2 years ago I volunteered for a position of no prestige. I was serving at a big event. The big event was being led by a family member and I was asked (by someone totally outside the family) to man a section near the stage because "they needed someone who wouldn't be starstruck". I remember saying "Don't be mistaken. I'm still star struck."

Still thinking here. Pondering. Searching for the words. What do you need to know? What do you need to think about? What do I need to say?

Sunday, a woman approached me. She spoke to me about my business and another woman in my business. Upon hearing my name, the other woman said "She's not anybody. I'd know if she was." Peeved. That's me. Peeved. But the thing is, I am most certainly "not anybody". No one whose name you'd know. Just a girl. Next door. Selling cosmetics. Going to church. Normal.. Not a world changer.

Now, one more story for the foundation I'm building for my actual point. Yesterday, our famous family member was honored with the invitation to deliver the prayer at the Presidential Inauguration. Not at the Lions' Club or Rotary Club, but of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. Yeah. That inauguration.

I'm closer. Narrowing in. Focusing. The words are coming.

HE IS A NOBODY, TOO. Was. Wants to be. Has spent his whole life in ministry seeking ONE THING: To make the name of Jesus known and to lose his own and now his own is known. How. Do. You. Process. That. ?

I lay awake on my bed thinking on it. Listening for the still small voice. I've been listening for a few days leading up to all of this. One thing is becoming more and more clear: All of the "somebody"s  were once nobody's. They were normal everyday guys who took one step and then another and made great discoveries. Steve Jobs - a 10 year old who got into computers. Mary Kay Ash - a retired woman who was sick of women not being treated fairly in the workplace. A 3 Star General in my family - a boy from a little town in North Carolina who later served as Multinational Corps Commander in Iraq. The founder of a ministry that fights against sex trafficking - a middleaged woman in a normal church. Beth Moore - an Army brat, I believe.

My brain, stirred in the middle of the night - World changers started somewhere - not seeking fame or fortune, but doing the small things they were called to do in their area of influence, in faith, leaning on God, in His power eventually being used for God's "immeasurably more than we can ask or imagine". Moses. Paul.  Rahab. David. Peter. A guy in our family who loves Jesus - steps out with one clear mission: to raise up a faceless generation for the reknown of Christ, with a vision for seeing 1000's of collegiate-age kids praising the name of Jesus, believing a large gathering of Christians should impact their local community and work together to do something bigger than one can do alone...

How do I say it? What are you hearing?

Here is where I want to get: WE CAN BE THE CHANGE. As one individual, we may not have much influence, but using what we have, joining forces with others around us, we can each individually and certainly corporately can make a difference. How? Well, when 5000 were gathered together and hungry, a boy gave some loaves and fishes. Combined with Jesus' power that small offering fed 5000 with 12 basketfuls leftover. A woman gave her last 2 cents - It was considered more valuable than larger contributions. David, considered "not anybody" took down a mighty opponent with a stone and a slingshot, "with what he had in his hand" (Beth Redman).

What is in your hand? What can you influence? What would Jesus partner with you to change? A (sorry, Louie) scrawny boy from Atlanta GA whose claim to fame could be that his dad designed the Chick Fil A logo, my husband's first cousin, whose chosen passion and vocation seeks to hide his own name and offer up, unashamed, the name of Jesus is being noticed for bringing together a band of activists and a bunch (!) of college kids to raise awareness and even seek to end slavery in our world today and as such, has garnered the attention of the President of the United States and will now be praying over our entire nation before so very many people. He's been given one of the largest stages to be the voice for 27,000,000 slaves. And he was just a normal guy - like you. like me. "not anybody"

I want to be a nobody like that - not for myself (Lord, please may that be true) - but to change one small but ever-growing circle. What's in my hand?

Unexpected Blessings & Opportunities to Bless

Lots on my heart and mind today and I'm having some trouble figuring out the best way to tell this story... I'll just act like you are here; I'll start talking and see where we end up.

I've just finished my participation in a pretty noteworthy event called Passion 2013. Passion events are organized for college age students (18 - 25) and have been going on for about 16 years. This year 60,000 students filled the GA Dome with very few empty seats and 3000 (older) volunteers all leaning in to make this a stellar opportunity to proclaim the name of Jesus, teach from the Bible and ignite students to go out into the world and make a difference, in this case to raise awareness to END IT (modern-day slavery).

Passion events take place around the world, 5 per year, in places like South Africa, Uganda and Vancouver. The organizers are Louie and Shelley Giglio and the speakers usually include the likes of John Piper and Beth Moore along with others. The music is always invigorating, inspirational and top-notch written by well-known Christian artists like Chris Tomlin, Matt Redman, David Crowder and LeCrae, among others.

Now that you have a brief and totally inadequate description of the nature of the event, let me tell you what is exciting and why I desire to be a part. First of all, I'll just name drop for a moment and say that Louie and Shelley are family. We know them; we love them. We know their motives are pure and that they can be trusted. Their desire to get people to live passionately for Jesus is what drives them. They are willing to go quite literally to the ends of the earth to share the message of freedom in Christ. We, the church, are to be alive in Christ and Louie believes that we should be able to muster up the kind of excitement for Jesus that we have for football. I can stand behind that. Jesus gave Himself for me, paying the penalty for my sin, which was great, breathed new life into me and raised me to walk in newness of life. He enables me to live my life in a way that I'm quite sure I couldn't and wouldn't without Him in my life. It's worth some joy and excitement!

Other reasons, I like to be present and serve are:

• It's just plain exciting to see thousands of college students raise their voices to hymns as quickly as they do rock music. And while some of those new hymns are pretty rocking, the kids are just as moved and moving when they sing less "rocking" ones. 
• I get to be part of something bigger than myself.
• I find that I can be slap worn out and still invigorated, even energized by serving these "kids".

But the main reason I like doing it, is the unexpected part. My job both times I served has been to be in the arena, part of the Touch Team, seating people, keeping lines moving, picking up trash, encouraging people as I have opportunity, putting on a big smile and making everyone feel welcome and important. Each time, I've been presented with unexpected blessings and opportunities to bless. 

The blessings most often come directly from the kids and you never know when. Suddenly a beautiful face appears and one says "Thank you so much for what you're doing." Big burly boys come in and offer great hugs, high fives, knuckle bumps. Another says, "I don't mean to be forward, but can I just pray for you?". This happens all day, each day. 

One of my blessings led to an opportunity to bless. I was cleaning up the trash: water bottles, granola wrappers, paper airplanes (goodness! paper airplanes!!) and I noticed, on the back row, 2 girls still sitting in my section. A soft voice, smiling eyes, a tentative demeanor: "You're pretty." I say, "What did you say?", 3 times just so I can hear it again. We laugh, we visit. Her name is Shundreka. I don't remember her friend's name.

The next day Dreka is back in my section and she's hanging out with me. We're getting to know each other while I'm seating the others. "The floor's full, start filling the orange seats. No seat-saving after 10:30." "Yeah, I'm working on my GED." "That's great. How old are you? Come on in. Welcome. The floor's full. Start filling the orange seats. Bathroom's that way." "Nineteen. I want to go to college."  "Aw. That's a great plan. Hi, guys! Welcome! Hope you're ready for the day!! Get any sleep??". More conversation. Bits and pieces. A family separated. Family broken up. Foster homes for some, but not for her: an institutional facility. Turned 18 - had to leave. Mom got her out. Mom went back on drugs. Wants to help women learn to be good mothers. Learned about kids by taking care of some of her siblings. Her birthday is in September. She's learning about me, too. She figures out she's a year and a month younger than my daughter. We talk more. 

I meet Dreka's Transition Facilitator, Tabitha. She got the money to bring 4 kids in a car from Little Rock AR to Atlanta GA. I get the name of the organization that's helping, Immerse Arkansas. "When did she have to take care of the family for 3 weeks on her own?" "When she was 5." How does your heart not break? Tabitha tells me she can tell far worse stories than the ones we've heard from former slaves (www.enditmovement.com). I give my card. I get contact information. Now what? I don't know. But I believe I've been chosen to influence this young woman. Please pray on this point!

Other opportunities came my way:

• Please pray for Tori. She was in a bad car accident last night and is in a coma.
• I can't find the boy I'm supposed to drive home. *tears*
• My mom would've let me go around looking dumb with that tag hanging out.
• Getting to seat 6 people on row 2 and the hugs that came later.
• The Dome security guard who I find investing in Shundreka, telling her how to find grants for college. Encouraging her. Believing in her.

Now you just tell me... who got the biggest blessing? I've never been so tired and so simultaneously invigorated. Yep, I'll go back - God willing. And I earnestly pray for God's blessing to fall mightily on Shundreka and pour out some of His "immeasurably more than we can ask or imagine" that we read about in the Bible.

Get Your Business to Pay Off!

For 7 years I've owned my own home-based business. It's not the only time in my life I've done this - through the years I've become a this or that type of consultant largely because I wanted to buy a lot of that company's product and I found that I could do so for less money if I became a consultant. It was a practical decision based on the fact that I'm a bargain hunter at heart. It wasn't a business - it was a discount opportunity.

I think many of you are the same way and like me, think that earning a little extra $ on the side isn't such a bad thing. However, many times we become disillusioned about our business and wonder why we don't make a lot of money - or we think that the big success is only for others. I have some thoughts on this and just feel like sharing...

This past year I took a different tack with my business from the years before and in so doing have learned a few things:

1. You must treat your business like a business not a hobby. Hobby effort = hobby pay. To develop an actual business, you must be focused and intentional about it. You (I) need to go out and find customers, provide good customer service, have product at the ready and make phone calls. That's how businesses run and home businesses are no different.
2. You have to prepare yourself to hear the no's. No's pave the way to yeses! Everyone will not want what you have but that's not personal. Just know this. Business is mathematical and a certain amount of no's have to happen before the payoff of a yes comes your way.
3. You have to brush up on your skills. Be knowledgeable about your product. You need to stay informed by reading company and team emails and publications. Stay sharp!
4. You have to be willing to be inconvenienced. I find that many of us just want what comes easy. That's fine, but you have to know you will have the type of results that come from little effort. To advance and grow, you have to put yourself out, rearrange some things, be flexible. You know the saying "If you keep doing what you're doing, you're gonna get what you've got." Sometimes you'll miss a dinner at home. You might have to give up some entertainment or down time. To change things, you have to CHANGE THINGS. 
5. Ask God to bless your work, not your laziness or inactivity. Too often we say "I'm just going to trust God with this" when what we mean is "I'm not going to try. If something falls in my lap I'll do it." People with this mentality often will not even let others know they run a business. What restaurant or shop would keep their doors locked, with no sign and then say "It must not be God's will" when they don't have sales? That's not trusting God, that's refusing to work.  I believe we must put in the effort and trust God with the results.
6. Operate out of integrity always. Plain and simple. Be honest and trustworthy. A shortcut now might help you in the immediate time frame, but will do more harm down the road.

One year ago, I was convinced to begin treating my "business" like an actual business. At first, I just began dedicating a portion of each week to work my business. Because I only worked a few hours in retail at the time, I committed 15 hours a week for phone calls, office work and parties. I had no great goals, but just started with the basics. I could have begun with 3 -5 hours a week, but had the time to work a part-time job, so I allotted part-time hours. As the year has progressed, I've learned more and more ways to be intentional about my work. Six months after changing my approach, I was able to walk away from my retail job and gain more free time in my life. I've discovered that I love finding new customers and doing parties with them. I love the flexibility my home based business affords me and the way it's growing me as a business woman. One year later, I'm a stronger leader, have advanced to the top 4% of consultants and am narrowing in on being in the top 2%. Why? Because I began working my business the way it's intended to be done. 

What IF you made the phone calls? What IF you recruited? What IF you were intentional? What IF you stocked your shelves? What IF you read the company info? What IF you attended meetings? What IF you reached for more? 

I truly believe home-based businesses offer us opportunities to earn extra money and even advance ourselves while still allowing us to be flexible and fully active in our family's lives. In one selling appointment, I usually bring in what I made in a week at my p.t. retail job. If you are a business owner, I encourage you to give it a try the way it's recommended. Be focused and intentional - not all day every day, but rather by setting some work hours each week and deliberately working. Then close the office door and go back to your regular life. I think you'll see a payoff!!

It's MONDAY!

It's only been 3 days since my last blog and already my life is different! I was just caught a little off-guard as I read Friday's blog on time... Has it only been 3 days? Could it be?

Truly, I had no idea what the past 3 days would end up meaning for me - no doubt, I still don't, but I know I won't be the same. 

In Friday's blog, I confessed my Facebook habit. I wasn't really ready to make a change, but inside my gut, the place where the truest emotions dwell, I knew I should - I must. I knew it I could free up time for me, my business, my family. I knew it could lead to more meaningful face-to-face interaction. I didn't know it would make me sick!!

Saturday, I attended a business workshop geared to help grow me in my business and as a leader. I listened intently as one after another shared their thoughts on the subject at hand. I listened as each shared their personal stories in growing their own business - how they got there, why they believe they've been successful, their gratitude. 

And then it happened. One highly successful woman started talking about time. About best choices. About doing whatever it takes. And then just like that, without any real warning (and yet I fully knew in my gut she'd say it) she said, "I had to give up Facebook." I thought - good for her, not for me.

But in my gut I knew I would. I knew I must. At least for a time. Still couldn't admit it. It had started brewing in me sometime ago. This was not news. I was just avoiding it. But finally, it was time. I came home. I pondered. I posted. I played Bejeweled Blitz. I chatted. I reread what I'd already read. It was time. I made a farewell post and I signed out. 

And then.... then I went to bed and began to dream about it. By morning I was sick. SICK! The vanity of it all! It hit me overnight - all I've been seeking is the affirmation of others. The time I've spent concocting witty phrases, wise thoughts, tip toeing around true feelings, blurting out things better left unsaid, stepping on toes, trying not to, all for me. 

I am not judging you, your habits or lack thereof - I'm guessing you have some bad habits somewhere, too. I'm pointing only at myself. This is my personal courtroom. I am the one on trial. I was guilty and felt sick. 

Yes, I know there is more to Facebook (and other social media). I am so very thankful for the ability to reconnect with people from my past, stay in touch with my kids, keep my mom and dad easily up to date with our lives. I love looking at your photos and learning through you. I do! But... when the house is quiet and I'm not trying to justify my choices to anyone, I know what I know. I have been caught up in a ridiculous form of vanity and pride. Wasting time, goofing off, pleasing myself, neglecting more important things, sabotaging my own goals and dreams. 

If this makes you uncomfortable, I'm sorry. If you think I'm still about the same business with this blog - you're probably right. I'm weaning myself off the stuff. But I know it made me feel sick. It made me weep in church. We only get one today,  and I had, time after time, frittered it away. 

I'm thankful for my new week! I love MONDAYS!!! Here I am - call me. ; )

Tick Tock

Rushing through Florence Italy.

Wasn't it just the weekend?? Seriously, I'm wondering how the week is gone already! Truth is, it's not gone - I have all day today to make something new happen and be productive!! So do you! 

I don't know about you, but I'm a pretty involved, active person - still I find that waste lots of time each day. I've been thinking about it and wondering if I'm being a good steward of my time or if I'm just making excuses to be lazy. Hmmmm. Don't get me wrong - we all need down time, but I'm having some nagging in my spirit about HOW I use my down time. Is it genuinely restful or is it like sitting around drumming my fingers on the table? 

Pausing in Venice, St Mark's Square.

And Facebook - trust me - I'm not really even talking to you here, just me! Goodness knows I'm a Facebook junkie. After sitting in Bible Study last night though, listening to Beth Moore talk about guarding our circle of friends and not allowing ourselves a steady diet of negative, gossipy, cynical talk.. well.... Let's just say I've got a lot to think about this weekend!!

Going into the weekend, I know I'm going to be busy. I have a conference to attend tomorrow and though I'm having mixed feelings about going alone, I realize that this kind of opportunity doesn't come around often. It will be beneficial for me to go, learn, absorb and get some new inspiration and motivation. It's a good choice! Sunday will be filled with church activities and then bam!, it's Monday again. Will I be ready and rested - able to give my new week my best? The "off" time and how I use it will determine my sense of rejuvenation, I'm sure.

Amazed by this clock in Strasbourg, France.

One more thing to think about this weekend. God's plans for us.... whoa! Are we tapped into HIS agenda for our lives, our weeks and our days? Am I?! Every day we have to make tons of choices about how we will use our time. For sure, God has given us exactly enough time to do what He wants us to do! I believe that we all have much more available time than we realize - but we need to reevaluate how we're using that time. Each week has 168 hours in it. Even if you work 40 hours a week and sleep 56, you STILL have a lot of leftover time! Still talking to myself more than you, trust me. 

Time doesn't wait.

So - as you move into the weekend, I encourage you to examine your day and your week. Draw out a "map" of next week. Block out all of your set-in-stone life requirements. Think: God first, Family second, Career third. My career choices, being flexible, are always the last to go on my calendar! Then see what you have open still and consider what God would have you do with that time. Time is precious. Once it's gone, it's gone. Time spent on one thing is time away from another. Give it some thought this weekend and let me know what you come up with. Maybe what you learn will help me! 

Life in Review

Oh my, my, my... Ever sift through a bunch of photos? Remember places you've been, things you've done? Well, that's what I did last night.

You see, I have a few new Facebook friends. Women that I aspire to be like. Celebrity types in my pink world. And well, whenever I get a new Facebook friend that I don't know very well, I go back and review my page to see it through their eyes. (I worry what others think of me. There! I said it.) And then I go and look at my pictures. It's just what I do.

So late last night, after everyone was tucked in bed and I'd played all the Bejeweled Blitz I could handle, I did the Facebook review. I glanced over my wall and yep, anyone who looks can tell what I do for a living... and btw, I'm very proud of what I do and the women (and some men) that I associate with... Anyone looking can see that I'm working. They can see that we added a new feature to our porch and that my daughter works in the same company I do.

Rachel Redmond, Debbie Sanders, Me - dreamers!

Next I went to the photos. Oh wow. I was a little blown away. Sometimes I really take my life for granted! Being a military wife for so long, you just get used to people making the same money you do and going the same kinds of places you've been. It's "normal". Only, it isn't. After being a civilian couple for almost 2 years, we've gotten away from it all and now I can look back with fresh eyes.

Air Force Ball in Hawaii

Ahhhhh. Zugspitse, German Alps

St Peter's Square, Rome Italy

I've been to London, Paris, Venice, Rome, Florence, the Alps, Hawaii, Korea ... starting to hear a little Johnny Cash in my brain.... I've skiied, hiked and sailed in dream locations. I've eaten stingray and drunk corn water (not that exciting, I know.).

Beautiful, romantic Venice

I've also raised 3 awesome kids who are choosing lifemates wonderfully well. I've been married for 29 (!) years to a man who treats me incredibly well. I come from 2 loving parents and have 2 fabulous siblings. I live in what most would call a dream home in a dream location.

Summit - Wiliwilinuinui Trail, Oahu Hawaii

Florence (Firenza) Italy

It's a little overwhelming now that I think about it. So, I asked my Facebook friends to shoot me if I every neglect to appreciate it. Now I'm going to tell you a secrect about me: I would be just as happy if I'd never been any of those places. In fact, I loved my life just as much when I lived in Oklahoma, Mississippi, New Jersey and Illinois. I'm just as proud of being a homeschool mom as any other thing I might accomplish in my life.

I love my life. I really do. And now, in my early 50's, I'm stretching myself in new ways and trying new things - learning to become a business women and leader of other women. I'm developing leadership skills I never knew I'd need. I'm seeking out women who need a way to improve their lot. Not because I have to, but because I want to. I love what I do.

Thanks be to God for the rich life He's given me in family and friends and may I always appreciate the opportunities I've had and will have. The lines have fallen in pleasant places and I hope that when you look at my Facebook page, you see a woman who loves God and her family and seeks to find joy and excitement in everything she does.

With the love of my life!

Korea - Stingray meal (and oh, so much more!)

Cycling and LIFE

Because I know you want to know.... These are more lessons learned while biking on some trippy hills that I think apply to (at least my) life. 

1. Don't wait too long to get back on the bike. The longer you put off doing the thing you don't want to do, the harder it is to do when you finally decide to do it. Got it?
2. Sometimes you don't know you're climbing a hill until you turn around. You know it's hard. You know you need more steam. But, sometimes you just don't realize what's really going on. You think YOU'RE the problem when actually it's just the way the ride is. Then you turn around and discover it's easier. TA-DA.
3. If a slope is too steep, you can reduce the climb by going across the hill. Kind of like, "How do you eat an elephant? Bite by bite.". Taking a major challenge and breaking it down into manageable chunks makes it.. well, manageable. Ponder, friends, ponder.
4. The longer you coast, the harder the hill when it comes... Be mindful of letting things be too easy for too long. Keep some challenge going.
5. Get the hard stuff done first. Saving those big hills to the very end only make it more difficult cause you're already tired. Get 'em done and feel good about it.
6. Sometimes it's better/easier to go ahead and push harder a few times than go round and round a ton of times in a low gear. I get the temptation but you can wear out your mental muscle and physical muscles w/ lots of repetitions that don't offer much progress. Push a little harder and get there!
7. Don't go near the house until you're ready to quit. Do I need to elaborate here?
8. Get your ride done and coast the downhill home. No shame. Work hard in the beginning and enjoy the fruit of your labor. I am learning more and more about this.
9. The lake is waiting to cool you off. It's really #8 again!
10. Do it again soon! If you wait too long, you're likely to forget you can even do it. Get back on that horse...er, bike... and ride it like a champion!

JUST THE FACTS, MA'AM (All About Pink)

I'm going to lay out the basic facts, plain and simple, for those of you who are curious about how to begin your own Mary Kay business and perhaps a little leery of making that known. I know how you feel. I felt that way, too, once. 

First of all, I'd like you to know, it's a trustworthy company. We have a lot of rah-rah-rah and a lot of fun, but that's for motivation and inspiration ... and FUN! Who couldn't use more of that?! LOL

Here are the main reasons women (and men!) begin their own skin care, beauty business:

1. Money - Everyone I know can use a little more $$$. There are no promises as to how much more you can make. That's up to you.
2. Recognition - Some people just need to hear a "Well Done!" now and then - wear a sash, a crown, jewelry. Our prizes include all sorts of things, including diamonds!
3. Self-confidence - How wonderful to hear and begin to believe that YOU CAN DO IT! Even very shy people grow and develop in this area.
4. Flexibility - Few jobs are out there that will allow you to work on YOUR schedule. In this economy, most of us need more money but have little extra time. This home business is the answer.
5. Car - High achiever? Earn the use of a car paid for by the company and 85% of your insurance. Why not?! Current cars: Malibu, Equinox, Camry, Mustang, PINK Cadillac
6. Achievement - The company does not set limits on how far you can go. You meet the requirements, you advance. Period.
7. Be your own boss - No one is "in charge" of you - it's YOUR business. Directors are there to guide, encourage and challenge you as you learn the ropes, but no one calls the shots except you.

Starting a Mary Kay business of your own requires the purchase of a Starter Kit ($100). You are recruited by another consultant and become part of her team and her director's unit. 

Step 2 is deciding how much $ you're going to try to make and how much time you are willing to invest. This will help you decide how much inventory to purchase. The more $ you want to make, the more you'll benefit from a large inventory. Your recruiter's director can help advise you here depending on your desires and financial ability. No large inventory purchase is required. 

You earn 50% commission on each sale. Active consultants purchase product from the company at a 50% discount and then sell at retail price. Simple.

There are no territory limits except what is governed by international agreements and regulations. You can establish customers all over the U.S. regardless of where you live. 

There are no party quotas or sales quotas. The more parties you hold the more money you are likely to make but parties are not required to be able to order from the company nor are you required to report parties (except for prizes and contests). 

Risk is limited! The company has a 90% buyback policy for your first year of business. This is why many take out a small loan, purchase a large inventory and set themselves up for great success... they know that if they change their mind, the company will buy back the unused product. Awesome.

Here are some questions to ask yourself:

1) If failure was not an option, what would I do?

2) What personality traits do I possess that will make me successful?

3) Where do I see myself in 5 years if I do nothing?

4) Where will I be in 5 years when I succeed at this?

5) What do I have to lose by trying?

THAT'S THE BASICS!  I'll be happy to answer any individual questions. Email me at sredmond2@marykay.com . You can check out individual stories on my website www.marykay.com/sredmond2 . Check out my blog on my recent decision to go all pink (give up my other job!). If you schedule a personal interview with me (phone, skype, in person), you will get one item from the catalog 40% off and go into a drawing for a designer handbag. Is there any reason you can't spend 20 minutes with me and get something great for yourself at an awesome discount? 

I Don't Wanna!

Wow. It is absolutely one of those days. Not the everything-is-going-wrong kind of days. That might've been the day when my daughter was driving in 100+ degree weather on a very long trip and her A/C went out triggering the idea that we might have to buy a "new" car AND my son was in VA trying to get to Army camp in WA in the same 100+ degree weather and virtually the whole city was out of power... for a week... AND soon after our A/C in the house went kaput (and still isn't right) triggering the idea that we might have to pay more $ for the cool air than we paid last week. No, it's not that kind of day. 


It's the I-can't-seem-to-get-my-buttarski-in-gear kind of day. These frustrate me to no end. I know what I need to do and just can't seem to get myself to do it (just thought of Paul in Romans 7 and am a little comforted). Oh my goodness, I can think of a million things not to do while I'm not doing what I need to do!


ugh. I have done some important things - like my Bible reading and my Bible study - but yeah that's really it. I know. I know. We're not supposed to admit things like this. I just feel like if I don't come clean I'm going to sit around the rest of the day! And here's the thing, the more I sit around the more blah I get! It irritates the heck out of me!!


I've also been to the Storage Unit and found the flowers I needed and put together the centerpieces for tonight. BUT what I NEED to do is exercise! There it is. Right there. I need to exercise. It's not that I don't like to exercise; I do. I love rising to the challenge and conquering it. So what's the problem? I DON'T KNOW.


Is it having 2 kids, both adults, home today and hanging around? Maybe. Is it a feeling of being overwhelmed? Maybe. All I know is once this starts it doesn't get better until I do what I'm putting off. SO, I don't want to do it - but I don't want to do what I'm doing either. I want to finish my day feeling good about what I've done so I WILL get up and do the right thing. I know it will get everything else going and I'll end up being much more productive in general. So there you have it. I've procrastinated by writing this blog long enough. 

Why I'm Going PINK!

This past week I made a decision and acted on it. I've been mulling it over for a month or more, prayed about it, and found myself increasingly antsy to do something about it. I've decided to go PINK! That is, I'm quitting my "day" job and devoting myself to my Mary Kay business. Do you think I'm crazy?

A few years ago (6) I decided to become a Mary Kay consultant. At the time it was a good financial decision and not much more than that. Oh, I heard the stories and I knew all about the pink Cadillacs, but that wasn't in my vision. I just really liked the product and my skin was better when I used it.

When I joined, I was a stay-at-home mom who homeschooled her kiddos and was active in my church. I could happily stay in my p.j.'s all day with my coffee cup in hand, getting dressed when forced to. I took care of my appearance for other people only. I weighed almost 50 lbs more than I do now.

Here's what happened: I began to think "Well, since I'm a beauty consultant, maybe I should get dressed in the mornings so I'm ready to represent." What an idea! Slowly, but surely that attitude began to permeate my being and I began to respect myself a little more. (My bad feelings about myself are another story altogether.) Over the next year, I began to increasingly take care of myself. I began to respect myself more. I began to exercise. It wasn't one thing or the other rather several things combined to help me and today I am a much healthier version of me. It wasn't makeup, but it was my perception of myself, day in and day out that changed. Makeup and skin care was just part of it.

Fast forward... Last year with my husband's retirement, I began to search for things to fill my days and provide some extra income. I wanted to make a contribution, but our country was in the height of a recession. I took 2 part time jobs making a small amount of money and worked them with all my heart. Many weeks I only got 15 hours of work between them both, however, I totally enjoyed being out and about. Sadly, one of the stores closed, leaving me with one of my jobs and no consistent hours. I felt like I needed to look around for something else. Meanwhile, the Lord seem to speak to my heart to "walk the path you're on". After much prayer, I realized I was already a business owner and perhaps I should work that business instead of look for something else.

By the way, as much as I loved my retail work, it was taking a great physical toll on my body. My legs were having some very serious issues that began to affect my back. I was dealing with considerable pain on a regular basis while having to work quite a bit to make a fairly small amount of money. Still, I enjoyed the work.

My decision to put real effort into my Mary Kay business came in late September. By October, I was already seeing that with some effort came payoffs. And the payoff was preTTy good. I continued to work it and my retail job. As I found success in my business, I began to let my mind consider greater possibilities. Up to this point, I thought real success was only for a few and not realistically obtainable. I now know that is not true. The fact is not many people are willing to really try.

Well, here I am 6 months later: I'm a Team Leader and in position to become a director, as well as earn the use of a Mary Kay car. (You work your way up to the famous Pink Cadillac.) I am motivated to keep on working because 1) I believe in the company priorities: God first, family second, career third. 2) I don't want to go through another summer of missing out on important family events because I can't control my schedule. 3) A little Mary Kay work replaces my retail job $ pretty quickly. 4) I have the opportunity to make much more $ (no territories, no quotas, no limits). 5) I totally love what I am doing! 6) The company has great integrity and is one of the few that has continued to make $ during the recession and provide hope for women who were struggling financially. 6) I like who I am. I am experiencing great personal growth and it's fun! 7) Weekly meetings filled with recognition are awesome! I've stood by for years watching the military members get decorated and acknowledged for their hard work. It's good to get some of that for myself. 8) I believe I can help other women develop themselves through their own business. 9) I know it's never just about makeup. 10) I'm working to follow Proverbs 31 and I believe it honors God.

The benefits of this business are rewards for consistent hard work. It is not a get rich quick scheme and doesn't promise to be. It's also not a pyramid. Each consultant buys directly from the company and moves up the ladder by her personal sales, her team size and her team sales. The company is paying the commissions for team sales. Each team member earns her own $ for herself. I'm so confident of this, I've introduced the business to my daughter!

So, now you know why I'm going PINK! I would love to have your business or even better have YOU as a team member! The more I learn the more I like it. Your support means the world to me and when I get that pink Caddy, we're gonna have a PINK PARTY! (BTW, those pink caddy driving women are making serious money and don't you doubt it. Give 'em a thumbs up cause they've worked hard.)

Singing in Church

Wow - there is just really so much I can say about this - good and bad. One of the first thoughts I have on the subject is the time a pastor said (only 1/2 joking) that he was pretty sure when Satan fell he fell in the choir loft. I knew just what he meant. Singing can be such a pride trap. It's often self-serving and individuals, yours truly included, get caught up in the performance and leave true worship behind. Often I can spot right away the ones who are there for themselves, probably because it's familiar to me, and I have very little patience for them. Some times I'm just plain old fooled into thinking someone is the real deal only to discover they're not.

I remember my first solo. I was 16 years old at Ardmore Baptist Church in Winston-Salem, NC. We'd just come back from a retreat and the Youth were asked to lead the service. Someone asked me to sing the first few lines of "What a Friend We Have in Jesus" and the rest of the church would join in. Trust me - I had no self-serving goals here - I just didn't want to ruin the service for everyone. I made it through but still clearly recall the nerves.

But somewhere along the way, I got derailed. After having enough people tell you you're good at something, you buy into it. We were in a church that was televised and I started having strangers greet me and tell me they'd seen me sing one thing or another and like it. Wow, it felt good. Because t.v. was involved I began to care (a lot) about what I wore on solo Sundays and if my nails were done cause you know, the camera would zoom in and that really mattered. (ahem) And then it was about the dress and the hair and the makeup... and choosing just the right song...to show off my voice.

Now hear this loud and clear. I don't think there's a thing wrong with looking your best for church and/or t.v.  There's nothing wrong with nice nails, dresses and makeup. However comma there's a lot wrong with doing it all for the wrong reasons, trying to impress people and forgetting why you're really there. I thought singing was my spiritual gift and that it was my great ministry donation to the church. MANY MANY singing types believe this even if they don't admit to it. And that's when things start to go wrong.


I wish I could tell you exactly when God got a good hold of me and turned this around. I remember accepting a leadership role for a women's retreat and saying yes to leading their music (oh, so proud!) without ever praying about it and having to go back and retract my "yes" knowing God had not led that decision. That was plenty humbling. But really, I suppose it became quite clear when I finally studied what the Scriptures say about spiritual gifts and realized that singing in the choir wasn't on the list. hmmm. What now?

I studied the Word and it became clear to me that the Holy Spirit had gifted me with exhortation and teaching. SO ... I now had a new understanding of my role in church and it wasn't singing per se, although there's nothing wrong with singing either. Are you getting my drift? I, like you, had ministry responsibility that involved using those gifts in my weak, flawed self and letting the Holy Spirit work through me. I began studying the Word more and teaching Bible Study (after some time learning to study) and encouraging people to step up to the line and walk according to the Word. And... when I was asked to sing, I sought songs that did the same thing. Songs that were based soundly on the Scriptures and encouraged me in my walk. And ... when I sang I was humbled by the request and sought to help us as a church fix our eyes on Christ, the Author and Finisher of our faith. Each time it became less about me and more about God ... in MY heart. And I believe that has made me a better singer.

I've seen great vocalists who weren't that worshipful - even though they did all the right moves. I've also seen marginal vocalists who were incredibly worshipful even though they did nothing noteworthy but humble themselves. BUT, I've also seen fanTAStic singers, with great hair, nails and makeup who were totally humbled before Christ and not full of themselves at all.

This singing in church thing is a tricky deal and we who sing must be aware. We can get caught up in the flattery of it all and lose the worship just. like. that. Pray for me, for I love to share the music God lays on my heart. Sometimes the Lord pours out an extra blessing on me and brings my voice up a notch (or several). I pray that I always remember how hard I have to work to sing good notes (No, it's not easy for me. I tend to sing flat and push too hard.). I pray that I always seek to glorify God and lead people to look at Jesus not me. AND I sincerely pray, that if it becomes about me, God will remove me from that ministry. It's not worth it. Worship is not music alone. Some of my most meaningful worship happens in a silent room with no one but me around.

Today, I had the privilege of singing at my new church home for the first time. I started falling into some old traps because I want everyone to like me yada yada yada. I yielded that to the Lord in prayer, but had another problem. My body was flat worn out and I'd chosen a flashy HIGH song to sing. Fearing a great humiliating "performance" I planned on the way to church to change songs to something less demanding. My voice was just too tired to do the work required. I went into rehearsal and offered the first song (because it was relevant to our study in Revelation) knowing I'd probably have to change songs. However, the moment I began to sing, I knew that the Lord's blessing was on it and I'd have the high notes when I needed them (it wasn't that way in the car, trust me). I KNEW I didn't have this in my own ability, but God provided in a big way. I got such a personal blessing seeing afresh that He can do things we can't imagine. If you're not a believer this might not make much sense to you. I just believe He wanted us to be reminded of His great majesty which is what the song is about and decided it was worth it to Him to help me along. I know I do not sing like that on my own. What a blessing! No temptation to get the big head when you know your limits. Thank You Jesus.

The Next Step

What makes you happy? What makes you secure? How do you handle your life? How do you keep yourself productive? 

For me - it's having a plan. Sure, plans are filled with all kinds of false security, but oh the (false) confidence of having one. My online buddies and I sit around on the computer and plan out our days all the time. We talk about where we're going, what we'll do when we get there, how we'll get there, and what we'll eat along the way. We talk about long-term and short-term plans and the impact of the unforeseen on our carefully laid plans. I like a plan. A to-do list. Goals.

Suddenly, and you might have picked up on this, I find myself unable to make any long-term plans. Our life is in this odd-feeling limbo land. And though, none of us really knows what tomorrow holds, I'm now more acutely aware of that fact than ever before.

So, what am I doing? I'm taking the next step. When something comes my way, I'm stepping out and saying, "Yes" unless there's a good reason not to. I have no idea where my path is leading or when I'll get "there" (whatever that means), but I'm finding a bit of freedom in letting go of the plan. I don't even know my work schedule until a week before.

Here's what I do know, based on the authority of the word of God:

God knows my next step and where I'm going. Just like a difficult hike or river trip often needs a guide, I need a guide for my life. I don't have to know the details if my guide is trustworthy. I just take the next step.

         

"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and future." Jeremiah 29:11

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5,6

Where I Live . . .

Some of you have been here, some of you have heard about it and some of you have no clue. If you're not from the South, it might be hard to put it all together and fully appreciate it; I don't know. All I know is, it's where we live and how things are.

Sunset

I live smack-dab (that's the way we say it here) on the Georgia/Alabama state line. Those of us on this side of the line nearly always give thanks for that great blessing. I don't know how the folks on the other side feel about it, except one of my family members who lives smack DAB on the other side, in view of my house, and gets tired of us giving so much thanks for living in Georgia. I watch the sun set in Alabama (from the Georgia side) every night and it's quite beautiful, so maybe Alabama has some blessings too. I don't know for sure, but maybe. ; )


Anyway, they call the place where we live "The Backwaters". Sometimes it's called "The River" (pronounced "Thuh Rivah") and sometimes it's called "The Lake". Everyone pretty much knows what you mean when you say it. It's a lake ON a river - created with a dam.

The Cabin

We call the home we live in "The Cabin". It's not a cabin; it's a house. We call it the cabin because it used to be a cabin before we tore that down and built the house and truth be told, it wasn't really a cabin then, it was more like a shack, but not trashy, just very humble. We loved it. LOVED it. Spent nearly every vacation there. Had all our big family gatherings there. Taught our kids to love it. Loved it so much that when we built the new house, we kept the term "cabin" because it's so special to us and brings up all the wonderful memories that go with it.


Up on the main road, before you hit all the back roads, coming from town there's a little establishment that sells necessities you might not want to drive 25 minutes into town to pick up. Ice, beer, soft drinks, bacon, butter, bread, gas - it's called "The Store". Once upon a time "The Store" used to be across the street, but then they moved. Next door to "The Store" a little business opened up that sold hammers and nails and pine straw and plumbing parts. It was called "The Hardware Store".  It sold recently and they sell trailer hitches now. I don't what they're calling it these days. We have a little shopping center with a homecooking restaurant, a bar and a few other things that go in and out of business and that's about it anywhere near us.

Our kids on a vacation at The Cabin

When you exit the interstate from the north side to head to the backwaters, rivah, lake there's a 4-way stop and there at the 4-way stop is a cinder block building painted top to bottom with, frankly speaking, the most awful mural I've every seen. It's the woods and deer and such all over it. There's a dirt parking lot of sorts and that's it, except for the little yard sheds out back. This establishment is called "Hunter's Pub" and for years (and YEARS) when we arrived in town for our vacation and drove past this awful looking place, my dear and darling would say "We oughta give that place a try sometime." Every time I'd cast my eyes sideways, scrunch up my face and say something like (I can't remember exactly how it went...) "Are you out of your ever-loving mind? I am NOT going in there. We have no business in a place like that! I can't believe you'd even suggest taking me in THERE." Something like that, I'm not really sure. Every year, for YEARS.

Finally the day came when the darling little cabin became ours and we tore it down and built the new cabin which is a house called a cabin. Some time during the building process our builder suggested we should all go get a steak some time at that place by the interstate. My husband's eyes got a little bright and I bit my lip or something. "Really?"  asks dear and darling. "Huh." I say. "Oh yeah. Just not on a Friday or Saturday, cause you'll never get in." "Interesting" we both say, but in different tones I'm pretty sure.

A good stretch by Two Tree Island

Needless to say,  we gave it a try and have been back numerous times since, most recently last night. At Hunter's Pub you can get the best ribeye you ever tasted, grilled mahi mahi topped w/ a huge crab cake that actually has crab in it and that's about all that's in it, fried lobster tail that will make you want to slap your mama, garlic mashed potatoes, sauteed spinach and killer sweet potato fries. And though the place might be filled with hunters, you'd never know it for sure, cause they're all sporting polo shirts and khakis. While there, you'll notice that the inside decor isn't much better than the outside and you might be surprised to find that the potty walls are camouflaged. There's some trophy bass on the walls, pine sprigs, and even a little lace as I recall. While dining you might realize that it's just an old gas station re-done for dinner and while you're there Jeff Foxworthy and his own personal estrogen ocean might walk in. 


And I guess that sums it up. . . I live on the backwaters and though we might not impress you, we like who we are and HOW we are. And we know good food. Don't mistake our humble demeanor for lack of smarts, taste or money 'cause, honey, we got a little bit of everything up where I live.

Feeling the Love

In the year 1999, I found myself  living in a new state again, getting acclimated, trying to sort out our new normal. Over the course of a summer and with some valuable input from ladies God placed in my path, I, with my husband's help,  decided to embark on the adventure we call "homeschooling". You might guess that this was no small undertaking. 


While it was a big challenge and an even bigger commitment (or maybe that should be reversed!), my children were all pretty happy with the decision. At the time, I had a 7th grader, 4th grader and a 2nd grader. That little 2nd grader barely looked up from the dinner table after our grand announcement and said, "Good. Now my teacher won't keep telling me to slow down, I'm working too fast." You know, I didn't even know that was going on. (and it wasn't because she was making mistakes.) 


I clearly remember the excitement, fear, and all-out joy over choosing our new school books. Oh! And the fun of getting those boxes loaded with OUR books! However, and you might have experienced this, it wasn't all rosy. In fact, at times it was awful. Not as awful as keeping up w/ 7 - 8 different teachers and their after-school plans for my family, but awful nonetheless. Please note: MOSTLY it was wonderful. Mostly.


I distinctly remember having goals for that year. One child needed to be released from the pressure of perfect grades and the sense that a "B" was failure. One child needed to be free to explore the fun of learning and see all that was out there. And then one needed to be shown that he wasn't dumb (by anyone's standards!) and discover how very smart he is. They all needed to know how much was out there for them and that it was all accessible. 

Our first day of homeschooling! Taylor, Mike, Rachel

Back to awful. Each child, and this won't surprise you a bit if you've raised or taught more than one child, experienced school in totally different ways. TOTALLY. Even so, there was one with whom I tended to go round and round. On the aforementioned "awful days" I struggled to keep learning fun. I feared losing him academically and that was before I brought him home. I certainly didn't want to finish him off and cut off his potential or convince him that learning was some dreaded task. I  wanted him to thrive, no  flourish. But on an awful day, which may or may not have had a thing to do with the kids or homeschooling, but could've had more to do with me and my own issues, on that kind of day, at least once, I dropped the math book in his lap and harshly said, "FINE! Teach yourself math!" Son, right here and now I apologize. I was wrong.

However, all 3 of those same children are now full-grown adults. 1 is married and 2 are in college. Today was the first day of classes. My precious child, now 21 years old, a junior in college on a full academic scholarship, called home. He chatted about 15 minutes. I listened. He told me about driving issues, parking issues & cute girl issues. He told me about his schedule, his book buying and how badly his truck was running. He told me about his professors and who was in his classes that he knew.  Basically, he just called to tell me all about his first day of class. My heart is full. SO FULL!